My Armada!
by Avrel the Teller
Summary: Battleship and former pirates are never a good mix.


"A-4!"

"Ha! You missed, Spaniard! C-3!"

"Damn you, you English bastard!"

Germany sighed as he watched the two nations continue shouting at each other. They were sitting at opposite sides of the meeting table, and on the table between them was a game of Battleship. "It will be fun!" America had promised while he set up the game. "We'll have something to do during our break!"

Of course, America clearly hadn't taken into consideration the fact that there would be two former pirates in the room.

"C-4!" England declared with a smug smile.

"No, my submarine!" Spain cried. "Damn English bastard! B-5!"

"Missed again!"

Germany looked around the room, his eyes resting on the clock on the wall. The break was supposed to have ended seven minutes ago, but no one seemed too keen when they could watch Spain and England yell at each other over a game of Battleship. France and Denmark stood in the corner, making bets on the outcome. America was laughing as he watched the game, and almost everyone else seemed too interested in the game to want to start the meeting.

There was a sudden grip on Germany's arm, and he looked over to see Italy hanging off of him. "Hey, hey, Germany, isn't this fun?"

"Not particularly," Germany grumbled. "It's wasting time. Our meeting should have started precisely seven-and-a-half minutes ago."

"Oh, but Germany, look how much fun everyone is having!" Italy continued, unaware of Germany's increasing annoyance.

"Fun," Germany repeated as he watched the normally cheerful Spain yell curses at the normally gentleman-like England, who was smirking back at his opponent.

"J-8!" Spain shouted.

That wiped the smirk off of England's face. "Hit," he growled in annoyance. "H-9"

"Miss!" Spain said, grinning. "Take that, you English bastard!"

Germany tried to block out the yelling, but it became increasingly impossible as the end of the game drew near and the former pirates grew louder, each desperate to beat the other. But eventually, the end did come.

"B-6!" England said.

Spain stared at his board in dismay. "No! My Armada!"

England leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, a look of satisfaction on his face. "Looks like I win."

There were cheers and consolations from the surrounding nations. France scowled as he passed money to a grinning Denmark, and the nations began to disperse.

"At least that's over with," Germany said. "Now we can finally start this meeting."

But before he got a chance to call the nations back to attention, Spain said, "I demand a rematch!"

Germany silently begged England to decline as the Englishman considered the request. England leaned farther back in his chair, so far back that it was a wonder that the chair didn't fall over. He eyed the Spaniard thoughtfully.

"I accept," he said, which made Germany groan quietly.

An excited light shone in Spain's eye. "I'm not losing this time!" he declared as he feverishly reset his board.

"Try to give me a challenge this time," England said, letting his chair fall back on all four legs with a _thud_.

"As long as you don't bore me by taking ten minutes to choose a spot," Spain retorted, not even looking up from his board as he positioned his pieces.

This was going to be a long day.

* * *

><p>After that game of Battleship, in which England completely dominated, Spain demanded yet another rematch. England, who clearly enjoyed beating Spain over and over, agreed. And on it went. England's turn. Spain's turn. England gets a hit. Spain gets a hit. England wins. Spain wins. Whenever a game ended, the loser would immediately demand a rematch, and the cycle would begin again.<p>

The nations started to grow bored. Italy had long since fallen asleep. Japan was stalking the nations with his camera. Russia was stalking China while being stalked by Belarus. Poland threatened to make England and Spain's capitols Warsaw if they didn't stop. But the games went on.

Germany was forced to postpone the meeting to the next day, and the nations began to leave. But before America could slip out, he pulled the nation aside. "Aren't you forgetting your game?"

America glanced over to where England and Spain were playing. "Er, I can get it later. I mean, we shouldn't bother them when they're having so much fun!"

"Then you will wait with me until they are finished," Germany said.

"Come on, dude! Japan promised to watch horror films with me, and without the hero, he might get scared!"

"Then I am afraid Japan will have to wait for you. Now why don't you try getting them to stop playing?"

America glanced over at the two pirates again. "Fine! The hero can do anything!" He marched over and began speaking to the two nations.

Two minutes later, he was back beside Germany, bruises beginning to form on his face. "It's impossible!" he declared. "It's like trying to stop Italy from eating pasta!"

"Pasta…" murmured a still-asleep Italy, who was lying on the floor.

"Then we wait," Germany said, giving America a look that clearly said "don't-you-even-try-to-sneak-off." America sighed in defeat.

* * *

><p>The games continued, England and Spain getting louder with each move. The only thing Germany could be grateful for was that neither had any access to alcohol. By now, Italy had woken up, and rather than leave, he decided to wait with Germany and America.<p>

America kept fidgeting and checking his watch, clearly wishing that he had been able to leave. But he wasn't about to disobey Germany when the former Axis member was this scary.

Germany was about to get up and forcibly separate the two when Spain let out a frustrated yell and threw the two game boards. Germany, Italy, and America could only stare as Spain launched himself at England. The two nations fell to the ground, beginning to fight.

"English bastard! I'll teach you to underestimate the true strength of the Spanish Armada!"

"You wish, you damn Spaniard!"

While the two nations were busy, Germany began to gather up the game. He brought them over to America. "You can go. Come on, Italy."

"Ehhh? But what about England and big brother Spain?" Italy asked.

"Don't worry about them," Germany said as America ran off. "They'll be fine."

"Ve…Okay. I'll make them some pasta later," Italy said happily. "Oh, oh, Germany, would you like some pasta?"

Germany smiled. "Sure. Why not?" The two nations left the room, leaving the former pirates to finish their fight.


End file.
